She was far from ordinary. She was the kind of girl who never opens doors, who walks with an overwhelming sense of grace and familiarity. She was the kind of girl you could fall in love with and stay in love with, that you could talk home to your mother. She was that kind of forever.
I tried to keep my hands from shaking. I was hit, struck by her. She did not make eye contact with me, just strode passed me, as if I had melted from existence. It took all my power not to cry out to her, not to beg her to stop and stay and be with me forever. Is this love at first sight? Is this how it feels when you find the other half of your soul?
And then she was gone, like mist, like smoke. She faded into the distance , nothing more than a whisper. I relive that moment in my mind, a mantra. I do it all different. I catch her eye, reach out and touch her. I capture her from her mundane life and meld her into mine, for book ends and happily ever afters. She haunts me, my very life a nightmare now. Life without her is a life without joy, without perfection, without love.
But she's the kind of a girl who never opens up a door, she's the kind of girl you know that you have seen before, she's the kind of girl that every body wants to blame.
And life without her is ordinary.